Photo by Devin Avery on Unsplash

A “flame” is the visible part of a fire. It gives light and heat.  The color and temperature of a flame depend on the type of fuel that is used to make the fire. A blue or white flame is often very hot, while a red, orange, or yellow flame is less hot.

Let me share a true story with you.  When I was attending the University of Wisconsin working on an undergraduate degree, I had a summer job working as a laborer for a construction company.  A laborer is a person who carries things around, such as tools, wood, etc. and cleans up after the carpenters.  The laborers position was considered an unskilled position, meaning anybody could do it. My dad was a carpenter and we worked for the same construction company. The carpenters were considered the skilled labor.

When it was lunch time, the twenty carpenters and labors would gather around a job trailer to each lunch.

During lunch one day, one of the carpenters decided to try to open the hood of his car with an oxy-acetylene torch.  The hood of his car was stuck in the closed position because he had been in a minor accident.

We used oxy-acetylene torches on the job to cut metal rebar we used to strengthen concrete walls and footings we were pouring for the building we were constructing.

An “oxy-acetylene” torch is a gas torch that burns a mixture of acetylene and oxygen gases to produce a high-temperature flame (about 5,400°F or about 3,000°C) that can cut metal.  Both acetylene and oxygen are flammable gases by themselves and highly flammable when mixed together.

The oxy-acetylene torches we used had a first metal tank including the oxygen gas and a second metal tank including the acetylene gas bound together with metal straps.  Each pair of torch tanks was included on a small wheeled dolly to make it easy for us to move around the job site. Each pair of tanks also included a set of hoses and pressure gauges with a torch component that provided a flame when lit.   Each individual tank was about five feet high. 

We had ten such full oxy-acetylene tank pairs next to the lunch trailer.

The carpenter pulled up his car right next to the lunch trailer and the ten pairs of oxy-acetylene tanks.  He took out a match and lit an oxy-acetylene torch component connected to one pair of the tanks and tried to cut the through the metal of the hood latch bent in the car accident.

Unfortunately, the flame of the oxy-acetylene torch was so hot, it melted plastic components on the car, which burst into flames and started the whole front of the car on fire.  The car was in danger of exploding from its gasoline, right next to the ten pairs of tanks that included the highly flammable oxy-acetylene gases.

If these ten tanks of oxy-acetylene exploded it would have leveled everything on the job site and would have killed or severely injured everyone on the job site including me.

The job foreman immediately sprang into action and screamed at someone to get the car away from the lunch trailer as he called the fire department for assistance.  Since the car was on fire and could not be started, one of the other carpenters jumped into his pickup truck and pushed the burning car a long distance away from the lunch trailer and the ten oxy-acetylene tanks to prevent a catastrophic explosion.  The fire department arrived quickly to put out the car fire and prevent the car from exploding, although the car was a total loss.

This story illustrates you just never know what the final outcome may be if you light a “flame” to something in your life.

What I mean by a “flame” is not necessarily an actual flame from an actual fire, but an “energetic flame.”  Remember everything in our reality is energy that is constantly moving and vibrating.

As a result of Covid19, our current political climate, the significant social change that is occurring, many people are scared, living in fear for many reasons, are confused, in a state of transition or currently have very polarized attitudes. 

So how can you prevent what you do or say from lighting an energetic flame that has the potential to create a serious energetic explosion in your life?

  1. Think About Your Words Before You Speak Them.  People are very sensitive to the words they hear.  The words you choose and how you say them is very important.  Your words may, if not chosen carefully, become immediate emotional triggers for others.  The words you say also may be the result of one or more of your own emotional triggers being activated.  If you do not carefully consider the words say to your significant other, children, other family members, friends, professional colleagues, even people you meet on the street, you may be lighting an energetic “flame” that creates unnecessary verbal arguments or even physical confrontations.
  2. Be Proactive With Your Actions Instead of Reactive.  Take a few moments to observe all negative situations you are facing from the standpoint of a neutral observer. Do not react immediately.  Instead, look at all sides of the situation before you take any action.  Observe and understand the perceived realities associated with the situation you are facing.  Then take proactive actions based on your observations as a neutral observer. Being proactive allows you to control the situation and create and apply a positive solution instead of just reacting to it.  Immediately reacting to negative situations you are facing may light an energetic “flame” that leads to a negative, or even a worse case outcome scenario.
  3. Be Willing To Compromise and Collaborate.  Compromise means that in any negative situation face you may need to give up something to come to a positive solution or positive outcome.  However, if one person feels like they have given up too much, it can result in additional conflicts in the future.  One of the healthiest ways to approach conflict in a negative situation is to look at the negative situation as an opportunity to collaborate with someone instead of competing with them.  If you try to complete with someone in a negative situation you are facing, instead of trying to compromise or collaborate, you may light an energetic “flame” that creates additional negative situations or conflicts in the future. 

Not lighting any energetic “flames” that may create energetic explosions allows you to create a positive impact in your own life and the life of the others.

Out There on the Edge of Everything®…

Stephen Lesavich, PhD

Copyright © 2020, by Stephen Lesavich, PhD.  All rights reserved.

Certified solution-focused life coach and experienced business coach.

If you would like to receive personal coaching by Dr. Lesavich, please visit his life coaching web-site for additional information.

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